My mom and I had a fairly typical relationship growing up. She, the experienced older woman, would tell me what to do, and I, the all-knowing teenager, would do the opposite. She was generally right. I generally got caught. And the times I didn't get caught, I think she and my dad just pretended... or ignored.
Things didn't change much when I entered my 20's. I was still all-knowing, and desperate to be out from under her wings. She was still being my mom.
Needless to say, there were some, ahem, differences of opinion, in our household.
But then I moved away. And got engaged. And got married. And got pregnant. And had a baby.
The day I came home from the hospital, she helped me get undressed, much like she did when I was a baby. Walking was difficult, as it can be after some 7+ pounds of small human explodes from your lady bits. So she walked for me. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, laundry, grocery shopping in a place that doesn't label anything in English, walking the baby... everything that needed to be done. So that I could sleep, and heal.
I don't know how I would have gotten through it without her and kept my sanity intact.
Needless to say, our relationship has changed.
I don't know if all mother-daughter relationships go through a change after the daughter herself becomes a mom. But I don't see how it can't. All of a sudden you become aware of a whole new perspective. And you begin to understand. And you are sorry for things that you said or did.
Today is my mom's birthday :) Her only wish was to hold her grand-daughter again. I wish she could have too, so I could go pee take the pictures I forgot to take when we were home in July. But we made do with the webcam. Its not perfect, but its all we have for now.
Happy Birthday Mom!! Wish you were here.