Showing posts with label Home Sweet Home. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Home Sweet Home. Show all posts

Friday, January 30, 2009

The Ganges and The Nile


The Ganges and The Nile
David Rudder

Once upon a time there was a magic island,
Full of magic people.
Let me tell you a story
'Bout their pain and their glory, oh yeah.

Many rivers flowed to this naked isle
Bringing fear and pain
But also a brand new style.
And of all these rivers that shaped this land
Two mighty ones move like a sculptors hand.
And today those hands, across the land, man, they're still landscaping.
And there's no doubt we go work it out, there is no escaping.
As the river flows there are those who would change its passage.
But every common man got to under-stand up and send a message.
So put up your hand if you understand now.
Come.

See how we moving, watch how we grooving
See how we step in style.
One lovely nation, under a groove
The Ganges come meet the Nile.
Them boys with the hidden agendas, and the mind-benders,
People done take in front.
Various smart men, and politicians can come along if they want.

Cus the people got the power, and the glory.
See how we float in style.
See how we moving, watch how we grooving.
The Ganges has met the Nile

Differences, there will always be.
So let you be you, and I'll be me.
That's the damn ting self that makes it sweet.
Brother bring your drum, lewwe start to beat.

Don't mind them politcky politicky politicky politicky politicians.
And with their politricky politricky politricky politricky situations.
We done jamming and we jamming and we jamming and jam cus we know the story.
Let them fight if they want in this land of a different glory. (i might have this line wrong)
So put up your hand if you understand now
Come.

See how we moving, watch how we grooving
See how we step in style.
One lovely nation, under a groove
The Ganges come meet the Nile.
Them boys with the hidden agendas, and the mind-benders,
They will always do their do.
Various smart men, and politicians, dem could come along too.

Cus we moving with the power, and the glory.
See how we float in style.
See how we moving, watch how we grooving.
The Ganges has met the Nile

See how we moving, watch how we grooving
See how we float in style.
One lovely nation, under a groove
The Ganges come meet the Nile.
Them boys with the hidden agendas, and the mind-benders,
They will always do their do.
But now that we holding hands, trudging to the Promised Land
Them could come along too.

Cus we moving with the power, and the glory.
See how we float in style.
One lovely nation, heading to salvation.
The Ganges come meet the Nile.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Dollar Wine

I know you have been dying out which soca song could possible be known all the way over here in Elbonia.  Seeing as soca just isn't what you think of when you think about this country.  Vodka, snow, Russia... sure.  Soca?  Not really.

So imagine my surprise when I found out that a song from my home country was a BIG HIT over here, and also apparently on Disney Cruises.

There is a special dance that goes along with it, of course.  Like all good soca, there must be dancing instructions for the audience:
Cent : Shake your hips to the left
5 Cent : Shake 'em to the right
10 Cent : Push the booty back
Dollar : Thrust it forward like a dog humping your leg.  No kidding.

Enjoy today's workout!

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Pan sweet pan

I was going to post a song, Trini soca of course, that a friend over here in Estonia loves.  When we met (at a Caribbean party, natch) and he found out I was Trini, it was the first song he asked if I knew. 

But you will have to wait with intensely baited breath for that.

Because before I found that song on youtube, I wandered over to Tash's and learnt that she is taking Lou to the pan yards tonight.  And my heart broke a little.  You see, pan is a BIG part of Carnival, it being our National Instrument and all.  The pan yards are where the steelpan bands practice for the big competitions leading up to Carnival.    And there is nothing like standing in the yard, surrounded by those sweet, pulsating rhythms.

I chose ''This One is For You Bradley'' by Phase II.  They won the Panorama competition in 2006, and I heard them practice it just before I left for my life here in Estonia.  It was the last time I heard live pan. 



Sunday, January 25, 2009

Giving Praise - Trini Style


High Mas I © David Michael Rudder

Our Father who has given us this art
So that we can all feel a part
Of this earthly (lesser) heaven....amen
Forgive us this day our daily weaknessess
As we seek to cast our mortal burdens on this city...amen
Oh merciful Father, in this bacchanal season
Where some men will lose their reason
But most of us just want to wine and have a good time
While we looking for a lime, Because we feeling fine, Lord....amen
And as we jump up and down in this crazy town 
Send us some music for some healing...amen

Our Father who has given us this art
So that we can all feel as if we are a part
Of your heaven....amen
Forgive us this day our daily weaknessess
As we seek to cast our mortal burdens on this painful city...amen
And on this day when we come out to play and sway
And do a little breakaway
Some will say what they have to say
But only you know the pain we're feeling.....amen

As it was in the beginning of J'ouvert 
So it shall be on Carnival Tuesday ending (good vibes)...amen

Chorus:
Everybody hand raise
Everybody give praise
Everybody hand raise
And if you know what I mean....put up your finger
And if you know what I mean....put up your hand
And if you know what I mean....put up your finger
And if you know what I mean then scream
O, give Jah his praises
O, let Jah be praised
O, the Father in his mercy
Send a little music, to make the vibration raise
So Carnival Day, everybody come and celebrate
Everybody come and celebrate
See the ragamuffin congregate
Everybody come and celebrate
And everybody say, oo,a,a,oo,a,a I love my country
oo,a,a,oo,a,a I feeling irie (repeat)

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Feeling Groovy?

Hubby and I got hitched the week before Carnival in true trini-style with lots of people, lots of food, lots of alcohol, pore-raising-tassa-drumming, and of course, hip-shaking-soca-music (there was not much rent-a-tile dancing going on).

He left this morning for a week in California :(  I miss him.

This song is from Carnival 2007, when we got married.  It makes me think of my Funny Dude.



Sugar Boy
Written by: Kernel Roberts
Performed by: Patrice Roberts

Sugar, sugar (whoa whoa) X3
Sugar, sugar

[verse 1]
I don't know where you are, it hurtin' my head
I just toss and turn, you're not in my bed
Cause when fly find sugar, it just want to stick
Them women out there thirsty and they want to taste it

[chorus]
Sugar boy, sugar boy, don't play with my head
If I can't get you I don't wan't no one else
Sugar boy, sugar boy, please understand
Don't ever give my dinner to another woman

[verse 2]
All is yours my sugar baby from head to toe
Sweetness have my foot high up, I wouldn't let you go
You're truely a snake oil man in all that you do
You bring out the tiger in me when I'm loving you

[chorus]

[bridge]
Sugar, sugar (gimme sugar) X3
Sugar, sugar

[verse 3]
Do me what you want, you sweet magician
My body catching a fire while I'm wrapped in your arms
I'm going crazy every time we caress
Just don't leave me honey, you are the best

[chorus]

[bridge]
Gimme the healing, you make it right
Boy the way that you love me, give me tonight
Boy that feeling shivers my spine
Give it to me baby, one more time

[repeat verse 2]

[chorus] (X2)

[outro]
Sugar, sugar (X4)
Sugar, sugar , you're my sugar (X2)

Friday, January 23, 2009

Because I love to torture myself.


Despite my admittedly lame efforts, I am unable to ignore Carnival this year.  I tried for a few weeks, from Boxing Day until this week to forget that Carnival even exists.  I didn't listen to a single song, or look at a single Carnival website.

I've been involved in Carnival since childhood, like almost all trini kids.  It is in my bones, my blood, my veins, my hair follicles, my sweat, even my boogers.  And when this time of year rolls around, that itch starts.  The fever rises.  My waist and hips start moving separate from the rest of my body.  My feet get the urge to jump.  My hands want to hold a rag and wave.  My body feels the pulse of the music.

AND I AM STUCK IN THE SNOW!!!

There will be no skimpy, beaded bikini this year.  A wool coat is what I need to wear.  No fancy, feathered headpiece.  A knitted hat to keep my ears warm has to suffice.

AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

This just SUCKS!!!

But I have to laugh, because if I don't I just might go mad.

And I will continue to torture myself by listening to the music that is the backbone of Trini Carnival.  Besides, I need to ensure that the Angel is well immersed in her Trini culture, right?  And she loves it.  Because, even though she was born here, she is a Trini.  When I put it on, she bumps to the beat.  Because this is a beat that you can't ignore.  It forces you to move.  

So, from now until it is over, I'll share it with you.  I will try everyday, to post a song from Trini Carnival.  Some will be old, some will be new, some slow and groovy, some crazy and fast, but they will all be a real reflection of Trinidad's heartbeat.

Enjoy!

Today:  It's Carnival by Destra and Machel, from Carnival 2003.

Friday, November 7, 2008

WTF Friday


Last night I found out that today will be Friday. WTF! Where did the week go? In honor of my Eureka moment, I present all the things this week that have made me say WTF:

Only 35% of Estonians supported Obama. WTF??

The fact that this was a defining moment in history was not that important here (except to us foreigners). There wasn't much ado about it at all. WTF?

There was ICE on the car this morning. WTF!!

The Prime Minister of Trinidad wants to spend 35 million TT dollars to lease luxury vehicles for the Summit of the Americas from BMW in Germany. The local dealers wanted to lease them to the government at no cost. WTF?!?!?!?!?!

The tooth fairy now has to pay 20 dollars per tooth. WTF! In my day, I got 25 cents! Kinda like how in my parents' day they used to pay 3 cents for a loaf of bread, with cheese. Damn I feel old.

They say it takes a village to raise a child. So why am I doing this alone? WTF! (Yes, I have a husband, but he is at work all day. He does what he can, especially after enthusiastic discussions about the value of sitting on the couch with his laptop and its impact on the parenting experience.)

The cat's bowl is empty. Am I the only one that sees that? WTF?

I've been very tired, kinda pukey, head-achey, my boobs are sporadically leaking, but the pee-pee stick only shows 1 line. WTF??

Sarah Palin didn't know that Africa was a continent. W.T.F???????????

I saw a t-shirt that read ''Don't blame me, I voted for McCain''. WTF?

In 2 weeks, the Angel will be ONE YEAR OLD. WTF?!! Where did the year go??????? My tiny, soft, precious, beautiful, cooing, fragile little newborn is now a rumbling, tumbling, babbling, even more precious, even more beautiful toddler. But more on that in another post.

I am a wife and mother! WTF!!!!!! (But that's to be read in more of a ''Oh my God! HOW COOOOOL'' kinda way )

So there you have it. My Eureka moments for this week. Did you have any?

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

And now I hope.


So finally Ye Yankees have done something that the rest of the world fully agrees with. Kudos. Two very enthusiastic and wiggly thumbs up, with smiley lipstick faces painted on them (not the same shade Miss Alaska uses, obviously).

And now I allow myself the feeling of hope; a feeling that I have kept a lid on for the past couple months. Although I did take a lil taste every now and again.

I hope.

I hope that if a country as large and diverse and varying with extremes as the US can come together regardless of any differences to collectively choose something good, then so too can my own tiny country.

I hope that one day my faith will be restored in Trinidad's politicians, and that one day I will have a Prime Minister and Members of Parliament that I can respect, and even look up to.

I hope that climate change becomes an important enough issue in the US for Trini politicians to be forced to take it seriously too.

I hope that my daughter will grow up in a world that isn't 90% below sea level, and destroyed by war.

I hope that war will not be never again be the first option.

I hope that the disenfranchised young men in Trinidad's ghettos will see this new president as a role model, as something worth emulating, and feel the strength they need to change their lives and neighbourhoods.

I hope that somebody reading this will send me an Obama T-shirt (size S) :) I don't care if you have worn it already. I just want a little piece of history that I can be proud of, and that will restore my faith in humanity when it needs restoring.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

A scary story for Nan with horny demons and broom sticks.

ˇ
My bee-ooootiful friend Nan wants us folks who read her blog to write some scary stories, preferably with ghosts. Ooooo, OOOOOO. I don't have a story with ghosts; will horny demons be ok, Nan?

Back in 1999 I worked ''down south'' in Trinidad. Every evening, I would take a taxi to Chaguanas, my home town, and call home for someone to come pick me up. This was before everybody and their toddler had cell phones, so a line at the sole working pay phone was inevitable.

Sidenote: A working pay phone in Trinidad is a rare thing, at least most of the times that I have ever needed it. Like that time Dominique and I shut down just outside the most notorious ghetto (Beetham / Laventille) at 5 am (which incidentally is a scary story by itself). We walked all over town trying to find a phone after being robbed, never found one, begged the manager at KFC to no avail, and were eventually pitied by a KFC customer who had a cell. But that's another story.

So I was walking to the snaking pay phone line, cigarette in hand after the no-smoking taxi ride and minding my own biz. At the end of the line, there is a tall, dark man with a white tam (that's the small hat often worn by muslim men). He starts looking around, agitated. Then he zeros in on me.

''You should be smoking Broadway, not DuMaurier'' he offers.

Out loud ''Um, yeah, ok'', smile. Mentally ''Whatever dude'', roll eyes and make this face :-S

''Broadway is a spiritual cigarette and you are a spiritual person''.

Raise eyebrow ''OK'', and start looking around to avoid further conversation and wish for own car to avoid the weirdos associated with public transport and public phones.

Another sidenote: If it wasn't for this particular weirdo, I would have nothing to write for Nan. So thanks dude, and thank you Universe for making not rich enough to have my own car and cell phone in 1999.

Back to the Man in the Tam. ''Your lucky colour is blue, and your business day is Wednesday. You should wear blue on Wednesdays when you have meetings or anything important at work.''

Sigh, I guess this beats standing in a long line staring at my toes. ''Yeah? What else?''

From here on, my memory gets a bit blurry. There were a bunch of things he told me, but I don't remember them all. So where's the scary part, right? It's coming, it's coming.

''You have bruises on your thighs. You get headaches and back pains. You have a vaginal infection.''

BLINK BLINK.

''There is a demon having intercourse with you on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. That's why you wake up feeling so tired on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays.''

Honestly, I thought the Saturday crap feeling was just a hangover. The other days, were probably because I went to sleep too late. Couldn't explain the bruises, pains and itchies though. As for how the hell he KNEW???

''It was from a woman, through a man. She is jealous of you. Your light is growing dim and you need to do something about it.''

I think I asked him what I needed to do, or something else at that point. I remember he told me how to get to where he lived because he could help me; he was a Spiritual Baptist leader, also known as an Obeah Man (Voodoo Doctor is another name).

''But you will do something when the time is right for you.''

By this time, we are at the front of the line. He makes his call; I, with shaking knees make mine.

We continued talking; I guess about my demons. I don't really remember.

A few days later, I was liming (that's trini-speak for hanging out) with my usual crew, at the usual place: The Sheppard's house. Nan, being married to a Sheppard, was also there. Of course I told my story. Nan offered to take me to see a friend of hers, a yogi.

Sometime later (a few weeks, or maybe even months I think) we went.

Deep into the Paramin hills of Trinidad's Northern Range.

It looked like something out of a movie; maybe like a hobbit village in Lord of the Rings.

A house built into the mountain. Small huts around. White painted stones. Meandering paths. Huge trees that grew where they wanted, and have lived longer than my grandparents.

The yogi had long whitish-blonde hair. She had that open warmth about her. The kind where you know the person is real. She hugged like that too. An open full hug. ''We were sisters in a past life'' she told me.

Yes, it's another sidenote. She also told me that I will be a writer. And that I should write when I can. It has only taken me nearly 10 years to start doing it.

I told her about the man, the demons, how much I prayed that night, and many nights after, and that the symptoms had gone.

She took me, with my friend Rachel to one of the wooden huts. Nan was pregnant at the time, and decided to stay back at the main house. There was a straw mat on the ground, big open windows; a little bird was flitting around inside.

''You can lie down there'' she said warmly, pointing at the mat, and picking up 2 cocoyea brooms.

Sidenote of actual importance: Cocoyea is the spine of coconut tree leaves. The leaves are stripped, and the spines can then be tied together in big bunches to make brooms. They are great for sweeping the yard, and also, apparently for getting rid of horny demons.

''Ohm Kali, Ohm Kali, Ohm Kali, Ohm Kali, Ohm Kali'' she chanted, circling me, sweeping the spindly brooms over my body, inches from my skin. ''Ohm Kali, Ohm Kali, Ohm Kali, Ohm Kali'' louder and louder, picking up the pace.

''Get out! You are not welcome here. Leave her alone. Go away.'' Sweeping, circling, chanting.

''Ohm Kali, Ohm Kali, Ohm Kali, Ohm Kali''. Her chants began to get calmer, softer. And then she stopped.

''You must be a very strong person to have kept him off for so long. But he is gone now.''

Saturday, August 2, 2008

back grinding

I am up to my very tanned neck in wafting cat hair balls, piles of clean, not-so-clean, and definitely-not-clean clothes, half-empty suitcases, granola bar crumbs, beautiful white sand that somehow also made the trip but looked much prettier and felt less annoying in Tobago, and jet lag.

Whew

But of course I must find the time to blog!

I shall keep it short and sweet.

To commemorate a wonderful vacation, I present to you :

ME! Trying my darndest to squeeze every last drop of fun out of my last day :)

P.S. Sorry about posting the video via facebook, but this darn thing won't let me post it here :(

Monday, July 21, 2008

I'm baaaack... kinda

I'm still on vacation, but I have returned to the land of internet connections and laptops. Not that they were missed really.

My wonderful friend Nan, and her equally wonderful hubby (who I have known since i was I-don't-even-remember-how-old) put up with me, the Angel and the Funny Dude for 5 whole days on their family vacation down the islands.

Thanks be to God that she isn't crawling yet though, whew. Jetties and crawling babies, methinks, are a heart-attack-inducing combo.

But how wonderful to have lots of aunties around to drink tea, and the occasional baby-is-sleeping-beer, gossip, trade tips, and do other female bonding things with! And rambunctious little boys who can transform and be oh-so-gentle. And the beach just outside your door laden with cool shells, driftwood and rocks for Angels to explore. And warm, calm water for hours of splashing immediately followed by mama-gets-a-break-naps in a breezy hammock. And huge spreads of yummy, tasty, mouth watering, trini food!!!

And all in one place, surrounded by close friends.

It is going to be really hard to leave this time :(

Monday, July 14, 2008

Oh Happy Day


Doesn't this pic just about sum it up? I love my country... and it appears, so does the angel.

She is such a trooper! She has crossed the Atlantic, gone from living like a hermit to being surrounded be dozens of adoring aunties, uncles, grannies, grandads, some sober, some not, but all adoring and whisking her off to be adored by more aunties et al. And she isn't complaining!

And her mama is eternally grateful.

Grateful for the other mama friends who have completely different parenting styles, but don't judge. Grateful for friends who are there to talk about everything from nappies and boobs to Brangelina. Grateful for fabulous friends who have houses on the beach and allow us to come stay. Grateful for wonderful friends who take the angel to see the cool stuff over-there so that her mama can be not-over-there, even if it is only for 5 minutes. Grateful for grannies who cook breakfast, lunch, dinner. Grateful for a wonderful funny dude who looks after himself, doesn't mind the hours of girl talk, or at least doesn't complain, and fits in with ease.

Life is good.

Friday, July 11, 2008

A Tale of 4 cities

I had forgotten how HOT and STICKY it is here! Geeeeezzz. Drip drip drip, fan, pant, fan, drip drip drip.

Not that I'm complaining of course :)

Tallinn to London, 3 hours > London to Tobago, 9 hours plus 1 hour delay > Tobago to Trinidad, 15 minutes plus 2 hour delay.

By the time we pulled into my parent's garage i was TIE-UHHHD.

We left rainy and chilly Tallinn and arrived in equally rainy and chilly London. Not much of a story there. The angel handled pretty well, the occasional ''I am sleepy'' protests, but nothing too major. I'll admit, I was worried about the upcoming trans-atlantic haul.

Gatwick airport seemed to be having one of those everything-will-wrong-today days. Poor guys and gals working there. It seems that they are trying to replace check-in agents with 'puters. Only the 'puters eh working like they should. So mass confusion reigned. And the conveyor belts for the luggage were striking too.

Have you ever seen a Trini living in foreign coming home?? We talkin' bout 5 or 6 suitcases packed with all the tings in foreign that we doh have home. No wonder the poor conveyor belts gave up. The angel slept for most of the 2 hours that just getting checked in took. I was a grateful mama-bear.

As for the actual flights, she was a perfect angel! She played, slept, and flirted with everyone around. When she got hungry, hubby draped a big ol' blanket over us. I can only imagine how we looked, but it was nothing if not amusing :)

And now I am home. Its a bit rainy but at least its warm. Trips down the islands and to the beach are in planning, the phone in ringing, various aunties are stopping by, and mom is cooking. Ahh. Home sweet home.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

All my bags are packed

I'm ready to go!!! I'm sure I have forgotten to pack something. And I'm sure that I will discover that I need it somewhere over the Atlantic. But I'm sure I will survive. And as long as there are boobs, the angel is generally happy.

Sooo... until next time I get a computer and the internetz and free time to blog all at the same time:

I bid you Adieu (bow)

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

It's Tuesday in Tallinn

So Tallinn is COMPLETELY different from Trini. COM-PLETE-LY. Red chalk and blue cheese different.

There are cobble-stoned streets, castles (yes yes, there is Stollmeyer's Castle in Trini, but that's different), free wireless internet connections everywhere - even in the park, a reliable public transport system. Over here, ''punane'' means red; back home it means... well.. erm... I'm trying to keep this blog PG. I could go on and on. It really is a totally different world.

Back home on Frederick Street, vendors with ovens-on-wheels hang out on corners selling honey roasted peanuts rolled up in brown paper cones. YUMMY! It is a hot, sticky, sweet, crunchy, all-over-scrumptious, more-ish snack.

And they sell it here! Complete with brown paper cones too!!


That's my mom trying it out when she was here in December.


It's a lil different, to be fair. There's a cinnamon flavour to it here, and it's not as sticky. And the dudes selling it don't have dreadlocks and say ''yeah fam'ly''. They wear ye-olde-Friar-Tuck robes instead of air-brushed Bob Marley t-shirts.

But when the weather gets cold and grey, it never fails to take me back to the hot, crowded, vibrant streets of home.

Friday, June 13, 2008

YAY YAY YAY


It's confirmed!!!  Tickets have been purchased, there's no going back now.  I'll be home from July 10 to 31 for those who care :)

Whaz de plan?????
 
I wanna:
Spend a week at the beach; DDI, Mayaro, it matters not.  As long as a bed for the angel is not more than a few metres away from the action.
Laze in Maracas
EAT till I bust
Other cool island things that i can't remember right now.  

No partying this time though.  The angel is still somewhat permanently attached to my hip and chest.

See y'all soon!!!

Monday, June 9, 2008

Oh God, Please, No.


What is happening to my country????


When will the people wake up?  When will the government WAKE THE &#€% UP?

5 months old.  His mother.  My heart pains for her.

Yes Mr. Prime Minister... build big tall fancy glass buildings.  That is the real sign of development.  Ignore the babies whose mothers have to go back to work when they are 2 months old and leave them with strangers.  Ignore the young children who are dropping out of school to join gangs because that is the life they know.  They need Nike sneakers too.  Ignore the young adults who fill our jails and then come out even worse than when they went in.  

Ignore it all... build your buildings.  Spread your propaganda.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

There's No Place Like home! Part Kaks

Kaks means 2 in Estonian.
12 months is Kaksteist Kuud.  I'll let you say that out loud a few times.  hehehehe

Now, as I was saying.

Things I CAN wait for:

The looooooong flight... with 2 connections... with an 8 month old in tow.  I used to be a flight attendant (that's what they are called Nan) albeit very briefly.  And flights with lil kids were not fun.  And these flights were 15 minutes long.  Yes, I was more of a bus-conductor really.  Hello, hello, hello, hello, hi, hi, hello, hi... tug dummy life vest, point at the floor... good bye, good bye, bye, good bye, bye, bye... all with plastered Miss Universe smile... 8 times a day... roughly every half hour.  fun.  But I digress.  

The excitement of being on a plane lasts for a few very short minutes.  And let's hope that we get excitement and not all out fear of the huge noisy thing crammed with complete strangers who are giving off  ''Oh God, I hope that baby isn't sitting next to me'' vibes.  I'm pretty sure babies and kids do not like flights any more than the adults who have to sit squooshed up next to big fat guys.  But unlike the adults who can get drunk, sleep, play cards, read a book, try to hook up with other passengers, apply for the mile-high club etc, the lil angels kinda just have to suffer through it.  And they let us know this... us and everybody else in a 5 mile radius of the plane.  So yeah, I'm trying to get prepared mentally for a rough 9 hours.  And that's just on 1 flight.  We get to take 3.  And then we get to do it again to come back.  Any tips... pleeease feel free to let me know!

Being judged on my mommy-skills.  So far, living like a hermit has made it possible to partially escape the barrage of unsolicited advice, and tsk-tsk-tsks about my choices.  Like any mother, I am trying to do the best I can with the information I have available... and Lord knows I spend most of the Angel's nap times reading everything I can about child development.  Such a fascinating topic!!  And it does make you aware of the myriad of theories out there... some of it really quack... like the she-devil Gina Ford who boasts about how she starves babies into submission so that she can get them on a minute-by-minute schedule.  Her book was a best-seller too.  Poor babies.  I got her book as a well-meaning gift.  I don't have it anymore, and unless the dudes at the dump are wondering how to schedule their babies, in English, I have hopefully saved at least one baby from that horrid fate.

Again with the digression... back to what I was saying.

I hope I can handle being told that I am spoiling her, or that she should be sleeping through the night, or that I am crazy to still have her next to me at night, or that I should be bottle-feeding her or that I have in some other way ensured that she will forever remain my siamese twin.  I hope that I can smile gracefully, say ''Thanks, I'll think about it'' and sit on my desire to defend myself to the death... as I am often want to do.

I also hope that I don't do that to others.

Coming back to Tallinn.  The last time I did that, I left the warm, vibrant, musical, sunny shores of my beautiful and tasty country, and arrived, at the dreary, forever midnight, forever eating potatoes and white sauce, forever cold, dead of Tallinn's winter.  Gosh, it feels heavy just thinking about it.  But thankfully this time we will be coming back in summer.  And summer is beautiful here.  Everything is green and flowery and pretty... even the people :)  Everybody is happy, albeit half-naked and laying about on any and every patch of grass they can find.  Tallinn comes to life in summer.  So this time coming back won't be so bad.  But I know I will be sad to leave everybody again.

All in all, the good outweighs the bad right!  One thing about being so far away, it definitely makes you appreciate home.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

There's no place like home!


I'm going home in July :)  

Home is far far FAR away from where I live now, and even though I haven't lived there in 2 years, and probably won't live there again for many more, if ever at all, it is still home.  I think it will always be for me.  With all it's sky-rocketing crime, idiot politicians who call themselves leaders, and crazy inflation among other issues, I still love it there and miss it terribly. 

Even though I am over-the-moon to be going home, I can't help but feel some trepidation about the visit.

What I can't wait for:
SUN SUN SUN!  And not having to wear more than 1 layer of clothing.  Summer here in Estonia seems to have come and gone a few weeks ago.  Bleh.

Going Down the Islands with my 2nd family.  Hi Y'all!!  I miss you guys!  It's cool that I call y'all my second family right?  That's what you all are to me anyway.  I am soooo looking forward to seeing you guys and the lime!

FOOOOOOD!!  One of the things that ALL trinis miss when they leave home.  Roti, doubles, a good pelau, bake and shark, mango chow, curry duck, coconut water, Aunty Fatima's corn soup... drool drool drool.  I think I will be coming back to Tallinn a dress size or 2 larger.  Tough luck.

My Girlfriends.  It will be nice to have people other than hubby and baby to talk to.  Not that I don't like talking to them... I'm all about ''goo goo ga ga'' during the day and  ''baby ima want you'' at night (kidding, kidding), but there is nothing that can really replace your girls.  I miss them more than they probably realize, especially the mommy-ones.  Now that I've joined them there, I really miss having that support that only other moms can give a girl.  It will also be cool to be able to talk as fast as I want, in English, and not having to deal with the confused looks from others when everything gets lost in translation... if it was ever found to begin with.
 
The Family.  I can't wait for them to meet the Angel :)  I am dying to see my dad play with her like he played with me.  And I know my mom is counting down the days to being able to snuggle with her Pinky.  I think they are looking forward to seeing her more than seeing me!  I'm sorry my brother won't be there though.  And it will be great to have a couple extra pairs of hands so that I can cop a five now and then... if the Angel approves of course.

Tomorrow:   What I CAN wait for.